Forgiveness and Secret I Don't Know
by jayhogartismyangel
Summary: Clare and Jenna have a heart to heart. Spoiler warnings for the promo.


**Forgiveness And Secrets I Don't Know**

**Pairings/Couples Characters: Jenna, Clare, Clenna friendship. Mentions of Jenna/Bianca, mentions of Clare/Eli, mentions of past Kenna and past Klare. Mentions of Clenna and I guess, brief mentions of KC/Bianca(KCianca? Kianca? It doesn't sound as cute as Bienna.**

**A/N: Based off of the "Shark In the Water" Carnival Promo. Specifically Jenna's scene about not knowing her own secret and the Bianca "Makes Boyfriends Disappear" scene and the scene between Clare/Eli with Clare as the fortune teller, pulling out the Lovers and Death Cards. Most of this is just speculation, though I **_**do **_**think that Clare/Eli will be together/end up dating. The Bianca/Jenna stuff is just wishful thinking on my part. **

Jenna Middleton sighed as she steeled herself and mustered up all the strength that she could and began to walk over to Clare Edwards. It was the second week of a new school year and a whole summer had passed since she and Clare had last seen eachother. The two girls hadn't been on the best of terms back then, just a few months ago, but Jenna hoped that that could change. Especially considering that she and KC weren't together anymore and she wasn't sure that she ever liked him like that in _that _way in the first place. Sure he was nice enough, cute enough-_definitely _cute enough, and he was popular because he was on the basketball team, but now she found herself wondering if he was even what she wanted when she helped break he and Clare up. What if it had been _Clare_ that she had wanted and she just hadn't realized it or understood it at the time? The only reason she was wondering this now was because of the new girl in their grade, Bianca. A dark haired, leather wearing beauty he seemed attracted to KC and seemed to want him. At first, she thought that she was just jealous because KC, her _boyfriend _seemed to be falling all over himself for the new girl and her obvious flirtations. Then again, she realized that she was thinking of Bianca nearly the same as she'd thought of Clare. Not to mention the fact that when KC broke up with her, she didn't even feel the least bit of saddness at losing him.

With a small sigh she walked closer to the table of which Clare sat at at The Dot. "Clare?" She asked meekly, causing the other girl to look up from the book that she'd been reading.

"Oh." Clare's voice is a little strained as she fights the urge to say something sarcastic to the other girl. "Jenna. Hey." She says, giving the girl in question a half smile before turning back to her book and closing it, pushing it away from her. "Is there something you need?" She asks.

Jenna doesn't speaking for awhile, instead chewing and biting at her lower lip and shifting her eyes away from the other girl.

Against her better judgement, Clare becomes concerned and sits up straighter eyeing Jenna with narrowed blue eyes. "Is something wrong, Jenna?" She asks of her, furrowing her brow and mouth parting worriedly.

The blonde smiles at her concern and decides to take a seat at the table, sitting across from Clare and locking eyes with her. "KC and I broke up." She said, swallowing hard.

The other girl smiles grimly and says, "Because of that Bianca girl, right? He dumped you for her?" She nods as if confirming her own thoughts then says in a hiss, "I swear to God. That boy doesn't know what he wants! He had me until he dumped me for you, then he went to you, then when you got him to cheat, he acted like he wanted me again until I turned him down. He stayed with you, only to dump you for the new girl. The boyfriend stealer."

Jenna winces at Clare's words and then tilts her head and looks at her former friend in shock as what Clare had said registered in her head. "You mean...you could've had him back months ago and you rejected him? But-why?" She asked sounded awed.

Clare rolls her eyes slightly and smiles sardonically. "Because. Exactly what I told you. What I told him. He doesn't know what he wants and he likes to blame everyone else for the mistakes he makes, when things don't go as planned. He tried to blame _you _and only you for our breakup. Just like he tried to blame you for making him cheat off of me and everything else that has gone wrong for him. I'll admit, that you are partially at fault for our breakup and for KC getting me to let him cheat but KC has a mind of his own that he should use more. He didn't have to break up with me because the coach told him to or whatever. He didn't have to flirt with you infront of me, didn't have to begin to date me the day after or the same day after he broke up with me. And he didn't have to try and get me to help him cheat. You may have put that idea into his head, but he _chose _to do it. And I can't blame it all on you. KC needs to grow up a little more. He needs to find himself and discover who he is before he even _starts _a new relationship. He needs to make his own decisions instead of doing everything someone tells him to do. That can only lead to trouble. Anyway, so what is it that you wanted to talk to me about? I mean...it couldn't have just been about you breaking up with KC because really, that has nothing to do with me. Atleast not anymore."

Jenna laughed nervously and brought her left up to her mouth almost without realising and began to chew at her already shortly cut nails.

The shorter haired girl frowned and pulled Jenna's hand from her mouth in disgust. She hated it when people bit their nails. It was such a nasty habit. "Jenna." She says with a sigh and a careful shake of her head, some of her carefully curled, chin length rich brown hair falling to cover one eye. She brushed it back a little and then took Jenna's hands into her own. "Just tell me what's wrong. I know that there's something bothering you. I can tell so you might as well talk about it."

The other girl smiles appreciatively at Clare turns her head to stare straight ahead, squeezes her eyes shut and takes in a deep, calming breath before she finally speaks. "Okay um...I think I might be..." She stutters and trails of, breathing raggedly. She's completely unsure of how to say it.

Clare arches a delicate eyebrow and reaches over to squeeze Jenna's hand comfortingly. Just because she was still a little mad at Jenna for the whole KC thing didn't mean that she didn't care about Jenna. She didn't want to see the other girl hurting for whatever reason was troubling her and the reason for it. She wasn't that kind of person. "Hey." She says in a mere whisper, smiling softly at the girl as she rubs the top of her hand and her knuckles soothingly. "It's okay. Whatever it is, you can tell me."

"I think that I might have feelings for Bianca." Jenna blurts out, blue eyes popping open and going wide as if she's in shock of what she just said. She flushes a pretty pinkish-red color and locks eyes with Clare again, having to see what was going through the other girl's mind. She didn't see any judgement in the brunette's eyes. Only shock. She laughed a bit bitterly. "Yeah. I know, it shocked me too."

Finally, Clare seemed to find her voice as she looked over the blonde. "Are...are you sure? I mean you dated guys before. You just got broken up with by KC.

"Believe me. I wish I wasn't sure. I was comfortable not knowing but I'm almost positive. I didn't even feel anything when KC broke up with me. Not saddness, not anger. Not anything. Not until I found out _why _he was breaking up with me. I figured he just got tired of our relationship until he told me otherwise and about his "attraction" to Bianca who's been flirting with him nonstop. But I wasn't jealous of her. I was jealous of _him. _Of the fact that she wants him and not me." Jenna confessed miserably, feeling tears begin to sting her eyes. "And it makes me wonder if I even actually wanted KC in the first place. At the time, I did. I mean...I thought he was cute and everything. But now I'm not so sure."

"What makes you so unsure? Have you ever been attracted to another girl before? In this case, you might just be really attracted to Bianca's personality or looks or whatever. It might just be a case of not actually caring about the gender because you like the person so much." Clare questioned carefully, wrapping an arm around Jenna's shoulders and pulling her head down to rest one her shoulder

Jenna swallowed hard and looked away, down at her lap and her and Clare's clasped hands. "I've had a crush on another girl before. I just didn't realise it until...Bianca." She didn't want to have to say it. Didn't want to make the situation anymore uncomfortable than it already was. She might finally be getting her friend back and she didn't want to ruin that by having to tell Clare that the girl she used to have a crush on had been her. It didn't matter that she didn't feel that way anymore or that she liked Bianca. Clare was bound to freak out, atleast a little.

"Jenna?" Clare asked softly, wondering why the other girl had suddenly stopped talking. Why was the blonde so afraid to tell her the name of the girl she'd last had a crush on? It was so strange.

"Itwasonyou." She muttered inaudibly low.

"Jenna, speak up. I couldn't understand you!" Clare complained. "It can't be _that _bad."

The blonde sighed sadly as she realised that she wasn't going to get out of telling Clare. "I said...that my last crush was on..._you."_

Clare's mouth fell open in shock and she stared at Jenna with wide eyes. A soft, slow blush filled her face and she lowered her eyes to the ground. "Oh. Um...wow." She squeaked out, looking anywhere but at Jenna.

"I think that might be why I wanted KC so badly." Jenna said in a rushed tone, wanting to get it all out in the open now that Clare knew. She might as well tell her all of it since she already admitted the biggest part of it.

"Have you told anyone else about this?" The darker haired girl managed to ask.

Jenna shook her head miserablely. "Like I told you, I just figured it out a few days ago, after KC broke up with me. No one else knows and I don't want them to know."

"There's _nothing _wrong about liking Bianca, Jenna. Just like there is nothing wrong about the fact that you used to like me like that." Clare told her with a firm conviction. "Believe me. We all make mistakes. Just because you made a mistake by going after KC doesn't mean that you don't deserve happiness. I should know. I kissed Declan Coyne's _neck _because of hormones. Of course, I blamed it on the vampire books that I'd gotten off of Alli and had been reading."

The blonde's eyes widened and she threw her head back and laughed. Real and honest. "You didn't!" She said in disbelief, forgetting about her own problems for the moment.

Clare laughed as well and nodded her head as her cheeks flushed a deep, blood red. "I did. I'm thankful that Holly J didn't rip my hair out. She was actually really understanding about it."

"Clare-Bear, you know who you're talking about don't ya? It's Holly J. I've never seen her in action but I've heard that she could be pretty nasty." Jenna said with a shake of her head and a puzzled look in her eye.

"I'm serious! I think she realised that I had just made a big mistake that I regretted. She warned me not to try and kiss his neck again though. And she told me to keep writing my fanfiction because I had a gift." The brunette told her with a beaming smile.

"I don't understand what this has to do with me though." Jenna commented in confusion.

Clare turned to face her with a smile. "It's because I've forgiven you Jenna. I don't hold a grudge against you and I'm not overwhelmed by anger at you for taking KC from me. You should tell Bianca how you feel. Atleast give it a chance because she and KC aren't together yet and even if they were, would it really hurt to just tell her? The worst she could do is reject you."

Jenna opened her mouth to reply when suddenly, a dark haired teenaged boy she knew to be Eli came over to the table and beamed at Clare.

"Hey Clare, you ready for the study date you promised me?" He asked of her with a suggestive arch of his eyebrows as he moved his books and notebooks farther into his arms.

Clare grinned and stood up immediatly. "Yep. Just a second." She said before leaning in to hug Jenna and whisper into her, "Think about what I said." Then she walked torwards Eli, moved to lace her arm through his and looked back to smile at Jenna confidently.

Jenna felt herself smile back because atleast for the moment, everything was working out and was as close to perfect as it could get.

THE END


End file.
